2081
Transcript
See my main
2081 page hereSee the
official site hereBuy the
DVD hereWatch the
short film hereRead excerpts from
the movie hereRead the
original short story,
“Harrison Bergeron”
by Kurt Vonnegut,
hereThe year was 2081, and everybody was finally equal. They weren’t only equal before God and the law, you see. They were equal every which way. Nobody was smarter than anybody else. Nobody was better looking than anybody else. Nobody was stronger or quicker than anybody else. And all this equality was due to the 211th, 212th, and 213th Amendments to the Constitution, and to the unceasing vigilance of the United States Handicapper General.
The strong wore weights to make them weaker. The intelligent wore earpieces that kept them from taking unfair advantage of their brains. Even the beautiful sometimes wore masks in situations where their beauty might simply be…too distracting. It was the Golden Age of Equality.
Some things about living were still not quite right, though. April, for instance, continued to drive people crazy by not quite being springtime. And it was in that clammy month that the H. G. men came to take George and Hazel Bergeron’s son, Harrison, away.
You were fixing the T. V., dear.
I bet that was a real pretty dance, that dance she just did.
Huh?
That dance—I bet it was nice.
Oh.
Ooh, what was it this time?
Loud. Same as last time.
Sounded a little like somebody hitting a milk bottle with a ball peen hammer from here.
You know, it must be very interesting to hear all the different sounds—all the things they think up.
It isn’t.
Only if I was the Handicapper General, you know what I’d do? I’d have chimes on Sunday—just chimes. Kind of—kind of in honour of religion.
Yeah, I could think straight if it was just chimes.
Well, then—maybe I’d make them real loud, then. I think I’d make a good Handicapper General.
You would.
Boy! that one was a doozy, wasn’t it?
Yeah.
You seem distracted, hon’. Wha-wha—what are you thinking about?
I don’t know. Can’t, uh, get it straight in my head, but, uh—something.
You must be tired. Why don’t you stretch out on the sofa so you can rest your handicaps on the pillows.
I’m fine.
You’re always so worn out, if there was just some way we could lighten—
There isn’t.
I’m not saying all the time, I’m just saying maybe when you’re sitting around the home.
Hazel, if I take them off, I’m gonna want to keep them off. And we both know how we would feel about that.
I’d hate it.
So, nothing to be done, then.
We interrupt our broadcast of the National Ballet’s Sleeping Beauty for important breaking news.
WE INTERRUPT THIS BROADCAST TO
BRING YOU BREAKING NEWSNNS
NATIONAL NEWS SERVICE
Now, I don’t understand why they’d interrupt such a nice ballet just to tell us the same old news.
Well, what does it matter if they’re just showing the same old ballet?
Goo-good— Goo-goo-goo— Goo-goo— Goo-good evening. We’ve just received a warning from the Handica-ca-ca-ca— the Handicappuh-puh-puh-puh— the Handicappuh-puh-puh-puh— the Handicapper Ge-he-ge-gen— the Hand—
PLEASE STAND BY
NNS
NATIONAL NEWS SERVICE
Well, that’s all right—he tried. That’s the important thing. I think he should get a nice big raise for trying so hard.
Well, I think I’ll get started the dishes.
(hums)
Good evening. We’ve just received warning from the office of the Handicapper General that suspected-anarchist Harrison Bergeron has escaped from custody. Arrested six years ago for propagandist vandalism, broadcast piracy, refusal to report for his quarterly handicapping evaluations, and for the blatant removal of his handicaps in a public place, Mr. Bergeron had been awaiting trial in a maximum security prison here in Washington, D. C., when he, miraculously, disappeared from his cell earlier this evening. Please be advised that Bergeron is a genius and an athlete, is underhandicapped, and is considered extremely dangerous.
(continues to hum)
If you see this man, please contact your local authorities, immediately. Thank you.
WE NOW RETURN YOU TO OUR
REGULARLY SCHEDULED PROGRAMMINGNNS
NATIONAL NEWS SERVICE
Harrison.
Quiet!! Ladies and Gentlemen, distinguished guests from around the world, may I have your attention please!? There’s a bomb beneath this theatre, and there’s a detonator in my hand. So, I strongly suggest that you remain in your seats!
Now. My apologies for interrupting this evening’s entertainment. Hopefully I can provide you with some of my own.
My name is Harrison Bergeron. I am a fugitive, and a public threat. I am an abomination of the able. I am an exception to the accepted. I am the greatest man you have never known. And for the last six years, I have been held prisoner by the state—sentenced, without trial, to torture without end.
They…had hoped to destroy in me any trace of the extraordinary—and in time I came to share that hope. But the extraordinary, it seems, was simply out of their reach.
So now I stand before you today, beaten, hobbled, and sickened—but, sadly, not broken. And I say to you, that if it is greatness we must destroy, then let us drag our enemy out of the darkness, where it has been hiding. Let us shine a light so, at last, all the world can see!
Unit B in position in the Northeast corner.
Units A and D in position in the Northwest stairwell.
Unit F holding position outside the Northwest balcony.
Unit C approaching the catwalk.
Copy that. Unit E, what’s your status?
Stand by.
Um, we’re gonna need a little more time.
LIVE FREE
OR DIEAnd now, for my next trick, I’m gonna need a volunteer.
No one!? Come, now,…perhaps one of you.
Music.
Unit E reporting. The bomb has been disarmed. Repeat. The bomb has been disarmed.
Copy that. Central, kill the broadcast.
Enough. Just you.
PLEASE STAND BY
NNS
NATIONAL NEWS SERVICE
This is Central. Confirm, we are broadcast dark. You are clear to proceed.
Copy that. All units, stand by for entry.
LIVE FREE
OR DIEFOR DEATH
IS NOT
THE WORST
OF EVILSPLEASE STAND BY
NNS
NATIONAL NEWS SERVICE
ON AIR
PLEASE STAND BY
NNS
NATIONAL NEWS SERVICE
Uh. Uh.
That one sounded kind of like a gunshot.
Hon’? You look upset; what’s wrong?
(all choked up) I don’t know. Something, uh…sad…on the television, I think.
Oh, well, you should forget sad things, anyway; I always do.
Gee, I could tell that one was a doozy.
You can say that again.
Gee, I could tell that one was a doozy.
(hums)
Copyright © 2009 by Volume XLVI.
All rights reserved.