Alex Peak

2011/04/04:  The LeBlanc Credit Card

Also available in .txt.

There is a great hall, filled with people who are either eating or displaced—or both.  It’s not quite clear.

But not all of these people are what they appear.  Some are definitely human, but others might be aliens—or something.

I’m not certain what my role was in this hall, but I am there for some reason, and I think I was escorting special groupings from location to location.  It’s possible that I, myself, am one of these aliens—or something.

Regardless of what is going on in this hall, all commotion ends within a few seconds as a man—who I think is Jerry Lewis—begins to speak.  As I am standing there witnessing the unfolding events, I realise that the people closest to this Lewisesque entity ceased speaking first, and the general quiet radiated outward from there.  The fact that it radiated as such quick speed indicates to me that the audience all regard what this man has to say as highly important.  Perhaps the very reason all these people are in this great hall in the first place is to hear this man speak.  This would not be surprising, given that there are also a few broadcast cameras in the room, and all are at this time trained upon the Lewisesque entity.

What ensued was a highly-intellectual debate between the Lewisesque entity and some other man on the utility of war.  I think the Lewisesque entity was an alien, for lack of a better description.  He took the libertarian stand against war, and held the undisturbed notion that it is absolutely possible, and highly desirable, for a civilised planet to resolve conflict with a minimal degree of violence, never something so large that we would call it war or even tribal war.  One could easily infer that the reason he was so confident that a civilised planet could handle the absence of war was his experience with whatever planet or realm he was from.

The other man took the right-wing or reactionary stand in favour of war, not only as a useful tool, but as an unavoidable and therefore desirable tool to quickly ending conflicts.  This man was definitely human, and I got the impression, while listening to him, that the setting of this debate was late ’50s or early ’60s America.  While the man’s arguments were in no way convincing, I do not wish to pretend that he did not argue his case as intelligently as it could be argued.  Overall, the debate seemed highly stimulating to the intellect.

I know not why, but this hall was also the location for a distribution of what I believe were credit cards—credit cards associated rather directly with my name.  What connection this could possibly have with an intellectual debate, I know not.

But it gets weirder.  For, not only were credit cards associated with my name and my person available, but some rather personal information was also encoded into this card.  Specifically, this card could be activated to show my penis length.  Why anybody would make this card, or care to own it, is a mystery.

Unfortunately for me, whoever designed this card got my penis length mixed up with that of Matt LeBlanc from the show Friends.  I say unfortunately because, as it turned out, my actual penis length was greater than Matt LeBlanc’s.  And, since no man wishes for his penis length to go underreported, I had to take this error up with the person who distributed the card.

Well, apparently, the solution was for me to go online and, through transferring and relabelling various files with the correct names into different folders, create a Matt LeBlanc credit card in addition to an Alex Peak credit card, the latter of which would be for my own personal use and the former being something I could distribute and profit from.  And, so, that is precisely what I began to do.

But there is a catch.  You see, for whatever reason, I was convinced in the dream that his last name was Mauer.  In fact, the name LeBlanc had not even entered my consciousness.  Oh, it was Matt LeBlanc alright—the actor who played Joey on friends.  But, for whatever reason, I and the card distributor believed, and did not question, that his name was Mauer.  Thus, I found myself labelling the new folder Mauer rather than LeBlanc.

I was in the process of copying files and making the necessary changes to the duplicates when I awoke.